- Vladimir Lenin and Marx were BFFs; however, he and Stalin were just acquaintances.
- He created welfare queens in 1867.
- He birthed test tube baby George Soros.
- George Washington beat him in an arm wrestling match.
- He had an affair with Bill Clinton that’s documented within the Podesta emails under the keyword “hotdog party.”
- He wrote the textbooks for every gender studies class ever taught.
- He and Osama Bin Laden are genealogically related.
- Barack Obama and Marx created the Great American Race Divide in 2008.
- He single-handedly invented ISIS.
- He is still running rampant, engaging in nefarious Liberal treachery at this very minute.